The Kick that Made My Day

Yesterday, I skipped class because I was feeling really tired. Perhaps our little Graf was also feeling tired too, but s/he was not as active as usual, although once in a while I would get a punch. So, as I was lying in bed getting ready to go to sleep, I said to the little one, "Hey, what are you doing in there? You've been unusually quiet today. Can you let mommy know that you're doing alright in there?" Literally a second or two later, I got a nice big kick (maybe a punch) letting me know that all is dandy. It made my day!

Today, s/he is back to her/his good old self again moving around and having fun in the oven!

A Photo Collage of My Pregnant Belly

I've been taking weekly photo of my growing belly. Here's a collage that I made using picasa. I couldn't figure out how to get rid of the last few photos, so there are duplicates. The weekly photo shots start from week 14 until week 20 (minus week 19). I can't wait until it gets big and round! ;)

Week 20 - The Half Way Point

I am now at the half way point in pregnancy! Yeah!! Yesterday, P felt the baby for the first time! It has been great to feel the baby moving around. I feel like I am finally able to really enjoy being pregnant. I figured out that anything spicy and greasy make me sick so I have been staying away from Korean food, dhal-bhaat, and fried stuff. I also realized that I had this notion that when you’re pregnant, you’re supposed to be eating A LOT and all the time. I feel like I am eating all the time, but I have been eating in small portions, which have been helpful with indigestion. P also reminded me that when I was not pregnant, I basically only ate two meals a day and I hardly ever snacked in between meals. So, compared to my pre-pregnancy state, I am eating more and healthy at that. :) (Here's a photo of me at week 20 in my "western" clothes. I can't fit into my pants anymore so I have the button loose... If you look hard, you can see a bump....) :) I'll post my belly shot tomorrow.


Today, we went in for our week 20 doctor’s appointment and ultrasound. I really like the doctor that I have in Nepal. She seems very competent and is very thorough in answering my questions. I wish I find someone like her when I go back to India in a few weeks.


We learned today through the ultrasound that I have what is called posterior placenta previa. In short, in normal pregnancy the placenta is supposed to implant high, in the top of the uterus. In my case, it implanted itself low in the uterus. The ultrasound report indicated that it was posterior and low lying placenta covering my cervix. (I didn’t ask if it was completely covering it…) The doctor spent some time explaining it to me which was very helpful. She explained that usually people have anterior placenta previa which often corrects itself as the uterus expands and grows. But, with posterior placenta previa, it is less likely for the placenta to move away from the cervix. From what I could gather, the main concern is bleeding and premature birth. She explained further that if the placenta does not move away from the cervix, it would be nearly impossible to do a vaginal birth. She also encouraged that if nothing changes, I should be near a hospital with excellent neonatal intensive care unit in case the baby comes prematurely. The average gestational period for people with placenta previa is 32 weeks.


I came home and did some reading trying to understand it more. At this point, I feel like it is not worth being overly concerned about until I get a second opinion. There is a slight chance for misdiagnosis and there is the possibility that my placenta might move away from my cervix as my uterus continues to grow. So, P and I decided that when we are in Thailand in four weeks, we will get another ultrasound (we’ll be starting week 25) and see what the doctor says to us. If the doctor feels like it is a high risk pregnancy, then P and I will have some decisions to make. We may have to come back to the States after all.

Meanwhile, we’re going to pray, trust God, and take it easy. The goal is not to bleed (and so far, I haven’t had any), although you don’t have too much control over that as it sounds like it can happen unexpectedly. For now, doctor’s order is no heavy lifting, no intercourse, and no intense activity. I don’t really care too much about vaginal birth or c-section. I just want our baby to make it to full term, or as close to it as possible, God willing. We’d appreciate your prayers!


Other than that, I learned that I gained a pound since the last doctor’s appointment—now I weigh109 pounds! The doctor also said that our baby is active, growing, and no abnormalities can be seen. The radiologist said, “You have a hyper-active, happy baby in there!” Our baby is really active. S/he was moving around, kicking, and doing somersault the whole time. No wonder I can feel her/him so much! P tried really hard to see if he could figure out the gender of the baby but no luck. We’ll just wait until we get to Thailand to find out! :)

Happenings....

• Nepal is now in the process of forming a functioning government as the prime minister, the president, and vice president have been chosen. Politics is a hot topic here these days.
  
• P is kicking my butt in vocabulary memorization. His ability to focus still amazes me.
  
• I sometimes wonder whether I am getting enough protein since I am still having trouble eating meat and I can't eat dhaal (lentil) because the smell makes me sick. I've been eating yogurt, cheese, meat (once in a while), and drinking lots of milk to get protein. Hopefully, my new found pleasure for ice cream is also helping!
  
• I have been feeling the "flutter" regularly these days. The little baby is moving around quite a bit, especially at night. However, it's not strong enough for P to feel the movements yet.
• I got a friend request on facebook from an acquaintance from high school that I vaguely remember.... I've been trying to remember as much as possible who this person is... I remember her name but I don't remember what she was like and whether I even hung out with her at all! Weird...
• My nephew, Jeshua started kindergarten today. He sounded excited when I spoke to him this morning. Kids really do grow too quickly! I miss my nephews and niece.
• It's been fun to find out about friends who are also pregnant!
• I've been wondering what kind of support network I will need to create for myself back in India when I become a mom. I've been praying about it a lot.
  
• I'm so thankful that I have a husband who doesn't insist or care much about having delicious meals everyday... I really don't enjoy cooking... I cook so that we can eat in order that we might continue surviving.... It doesn't mean I don't enjoy or have appreciation for delicious food because I do! I just have absolutely NO interest in being the creator of such meals.... So, I really appreciate P for loving my other strong suits and feeling okay about telling me to give the finger to the pressure that I feel to be this person that I am not. (I will write another blog about this later because it needs more history and explanation.) I never felt this kind of pressure living in the States, but I feel it here all the time!
• Now my stomach is calling me for a snack....
  

Locked Gate and Didi

Last Sunday, we decided to visit and worship at the biggest and the oldest church in Pok'ara. At the end of the service, we chatted with a few folks and decided that it was time to leave. There were people hanging around the main gate so we headed in the same direction. We were suprised to find that the gate was locked. As we looked around, it was obvious that the gate was not going to be opened any time soon and that we should probably find a shady spot while we waited. While we waited, we tried to interpret why the gate might be locked... "Do they lock the gate so that they can encourage fellowship after service? Maybe it is so that no one can leave early?.... Well, this won't work in the States!" "Maybe, someone with the key is elsewhere and they're looking for the person..." Eventually, the gate was unlocked and everyone headed out for their next destination. Fortunately for us, one of our language instructor is a regular member of the church so we asked him on Monday about the locked gate. His answer surprised us. I would have never guessed, in a million years, why they lock the gate every week and everyone had to wait about 15-20 minutes after the service to open it up. The reason: To prevent shoe theft! The church had problems in the past where people would sneak in the church and steal people's nice shoes. (In Nepal and in India, for the most part, we take off our shoes when we go inside the church because we often sit on the floor.) So, they give about 15-20 minutes for everyone to locate their shoes and to prevent anyone from leaving the premise with someone elses' nice shoes! Interesting, huh?

I am still amazed at how different our lives are. We had our previous "didi" (literal meaning: older sister) who worked in our house two years ago when we were here for languague study and her family over for some snacks a couple of weeks ago. I had thought that we were the same age, but I learned that she was a year younger than me. While I am just preparing to have our first baby, she has three children, ages 2o, 19, 18. She had gotten married at age 15 and had her first child shortly after.... How different our life experiences have been.....

Another milestone?

I am not sure if it's my stretching uterus that I am feeling or the baby moving, but I felt something yesterday quite frequently and strong enough for me to let out a gasp once in a while. Today, I have been feeling something inside, although it has not been as noticeable as yesterday. I think it's the baby...!! P's been trying to see if he can feel it too, but I think he may have to wait a few more weeks. ;) My tummy is also getting tighter. I can still fit into my pants, but for the first time today, I noticed that they were feeling pretty snug. Well, except for strong odor which can bring sudden nausea, it's been really great to be feeling almost normal again!!

Recently, I've started thinking and praying a lot about my own spiritual nourishment and growth, especially as I anticipate a huge transition. I know that I will be tired, sleep deprived, and probably overwhelmed at times trying to figure out motherhood and my new life, but I want to experience God in midst of them all. I'm not sure what that will all look like, but I've been asking God to grant me that hunger to pursue after him and to experience his abundant nourishment, especially when I am dead tired. Perhaps, I will connect with God in a new way as I sing "Jesus loves me" to our baby while putting her/him to sleep, or as I read a Bible story to the child. Maybe it will mean that I check my email, facebook, and blogs less and spend that time and energy to pray and spend a quiet moment with God. I'm not sure but I've been thinking about it and asking God for his grace and wisdom to guide me.... Just like I will eventually get in to a feeding schedule and a sleep routine that works with the baby's needs and development, I am asking that God and I can develop some kind of rhythm that is both nourishing and life giving when I become a mother.

The waiting....

I went in for my routine monthly exam (week 17) and learned that we cannot find out the sex of the baby. The doctors are telling us that it is illegal for them to tell. On the other hand, our Nepali friends have been telling us that it is not against the law in Nepal. I'm not sure who is correct.... It might be that the hospital's policy is to not tell because it is run by Indian doctors and doctors in training from India... I know that in India it is against the law for doctors to inform the parents of the gender of the baby generally due to female foeticide. We might have to wait until we get to Bangkok at the end of September to find out. In three weeks, I'll be going in for my 20 weeks ultrasound so maybe we can try asking again then, or I'll have Paul look carefully to see if he can figure it out. (He's better at interpreting the ultrasound.) We'll just have to wait patiently. ;)

I think I am finally over my morning/evening sickness. I haven't vomited in 6 days! I also learned that I weigh almost 108 pounds. It's less than what I weighed before pregnancy. I wonder how much I will weigh in January. As long as the little avocado (s/he's current size) is doing fine, from what I have read, even if I don't gain a lot of weight (no matter how hard I try), it should be no problem. No photos or video to share this time. :(

My musings lately....

I have been mulling over a lot of stuff recently but I have failed to get them on to my blog. Now, I don't think I can write about them all because it will take too much time and you might get bored reading about them in one sitting... so to give you a glimpse into what I have been thinking about recently, I thought I'd just write down the questions I have been asking. Some are deeper questions, others are just random questions, but I have been finding myself asking more questions lately. Here I go....

• What does economic development really look like in a developing a country, and what pieces of the puzzle must be there for it to be successful? How does development that comes up from within and development encouraged from the outside look different?
  
• What does the Bible really say about the Kingdom of God? Sometimes I feel like people emphasize certain pieces that they resonate more with, but at the core, what does Jesus say about it?
  
• How can I grow in being grateful in midst of difficulties? Living here, I can count many things that I can complain about, but then I also realize there are many, many things to be grateful about. How do I deal with both - which I often feel at the same time?
• What middle name do we like for a daughter? What first name do we want to give to our baby if he is a son?
• At what point, do you become fluent in a language? I've been feeling greater level of sympathy for immigrants. I think many people who complain about immigrants who can't speak English or not so well probably have never really tried learning a foreign language. It is not easy.
  
• Why do many Americans talk as if they have the solution for whatever problem is being discussed?
  
• Why is it that there is so much talk about finding alternative energy source and about offshore drilling (for the U.S.), but hardly anyone is talking about changing our lifestyle?
  
• How do you discern how much or what kind of change is realistically possible when no particular behavior stands on its own and are all a part of an interconnected cultural web?
• What does it look like for me to love my neighbor as myself today? It is easier said than done....
• Why did God create a nine and half months gestational period for humans?
  
• Why am I not constipated when other pregnant moms seem to suffer from it? I'm not complaining! ;)
• Why is it that I've been craving Taco Bell/Del Taco the most? I don't get it!
• I wonder how active our little bean is and will be! I hope he/she is not hyper! ;)
• I wonder if we're having a boy or a girl?
  
• A friend told me that someone had commented on the difference between taking an epidural and not taking it as difference between hell and heaven.... come on, really? I mean is it THAT different? If it's THAT different, why isn't everyone taking the epidural? Heck, I would choose heaven over hell anytime! :)

So, there you have it.... here are some of my serious and not so serious questions that I have been asking and thinking about.

Pregnancy Update: I hope to find out the sex of the baby, if possible, this Sunday, but we will see. If there is gas available for taxis and there is no strike, maybe I'll actually get to the hospital! (On a side note, I was asking our language teacher about how do sick people get to the hospital when there is a strike and all forms of transportation is closed? She told me a story of a woman who went into labor during one of these transportation strikes, was in labor, delivered her baby near a bus park, and died. She said many sick people die during strikes just because they can't get to the hospitals! It made me so sad and angry at the same time to hear the story....Luckily we live pretty close to a hospital!) Anyway, hopefully, the baby will be still long enough in order to get a good look at his/her anatomy! The last time we had the ultrasound, the technician really tried, but gave up because the little bean was so active. We'll let you know what we learn! ;) I also just posted my 16th week belly photo... tomorrow will be week 17!